as i reach home earlier this evening after work
fixed my nails at NAILS NIRVANA, Tampines.

waiting for sis & 姐夫 to be home with dinner.
sitting in front of my laptop,
looking at the time,
looking at the date,
i have NOT forgotten,
you will be turning 28 in 11days' time.

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it's 1 more day to 4th month of us, being apart.
it doesn't matter anymore who's in the right or wrong
it just seem to me that my harsh actions towards you have somehow woken you up.
people say "leopard never changes its spots"
i beg to differ in some ways.

being harsh on you and myself,
i treated you very coldly, harshly,
to the extent of divorce.

i was hoping these could help you "grow up"
and it seems it did
but of cos, you have helped yourself the most

thank you for loving me, still

and i will be more than willing to start from scratch with you, again

let's be friends

一个星期了
我还是没有办法不在意

我觉得自己真的很小气
但就是没办法让自己不在意

真的很痛
真的不乡再想了
怎么办?
好想让自己催眠

是不是我太固执了
是不是我看得太重了
是不是我真的。。

太多的借口
太多的不能原谅
其实是我自己的问题吧。。

我要的就这么多
真的不可能得到吗?


如果时间能够倒流
我希望能够回到我们重逢的第一时间
那么我们能够重新认识彼此
重新了解对方
那么就也许不会像现在这个样子
你。。。好像离我越来越遥远了

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It probably never occurred to you that I would have changed so much that even I don’t recognise myself.

I stopped doing household chores, stopped asking bout things going on in the family and you, stopped sticking to you, stopped going back to AMK when you have school, stopped going school to wait for you before heading home together, stopped caring for YAOYAO, stopped doing this and that.

Has it ever occurred to you that these are after all the accumulative throughout these years we have been together?

Probably to you, it will be like if we don’t talk about it, voice it out, obstacles will disappear by itself. I have learnt that this will NEVER work. Infact, situations will only worsen as days passes.